20th Feb 2020, 11:30 PM
Go to The Back Room
"Thank you," you say as you finish your cup. "And thank you for the tea."
Ms. Halford holds out her hand, and you give her your empty cup as you rise from your seat.
"I... guess..." You stare off at nothing for a moment, trying to get it all sorted. "...If you see Kate, tell her I'm having a sleepover at the spooky house."
"You're camping out at the spooky house?"
"I own the spooky house," you huff on your way to the door. You stop. You sigh. "I live in the spooky house."
"Ohhh." Ms. Halford smiles wide, knowingly. "It's all coming together now." She grins just a little wider, and nods. "I'll let her know."
You begin the very long trudge back to the bus stop.
Past one field
and a bait shop
which you see some actual movement through the windows of, prompting you to walk faster
and past another field.
The bus arrives rather quickly; you don't think they went far.
"She wasn't home," you inform the bus. "Can you take me to The Back Room?"
"Sure," the bus replies.
You once again survey the damage of the less populated part of the town as you pass through it. You had to have ridden past here this morning, right? When the bus dropped Kate off...?
But then, you were still half asleep at the time
and Kate was here
and you probably just... didn't notice how it looked outside.
"Has anyone asked about me?," you suddenly ask the bus.
"No," says the bus.
"Can you let me know if anyone does?"
"Sure," the bus replies, "I'll make a note to log it if anyone inquires about you."
"Thanks," you say with a small nod. "I don't know how deep and big conspiracy this whole thing's gonna go, but... I want to try and stay on top of it. Oh! And if you see Kate, tell her I'm doing a thing tonight and she's invited? Please?"
"Will do," says the bus.
Near the edge of where the decay starts, the bus reaches a small shopping strip. Wedged between an "Old Fashioned" Burger Joint and a Massage Place
is The Back Room.
The bus pulls up to a stop on the far end of the parking lot.
You thank the bus, and head inside.
Absolute silence.
Two people behind the counter--one pretty old, the other a (vaguely familiar?) teenager, stare you down like you just caught them committing a crime.
"Bro," whispers the large teen, "there's a girl in here."
"Are... you looking for the massage place?" The older man points in their general direction.
You shake your head. "This is The Back Room, right?"
"Oh, shit," whispers the large teen, "she's here on purpose."
"Well," the old man whispers back, "she passes the shoe test."
"What's the shoe test?," you ask, finally breaking the illusion that you can't hear them whispering.
Their respective eyes widen. The two straighten their postures a bit.
The older man speaks first. "You can usually tell a cop by their shoes."
"You don't have cop shoes," the rotund boy adds a bit more quietly.
"This is the second time today someone thought I might be a cop," you mutter, shaking your head in mild disbelief. "People have pets bigger than me, how do I look like a cop?"
"Well," begins the old man, "you walk like you're about to arrest somebody. Or burn the building down. Welcome to The Back Room! I'm Marlow, though half the town calls me Tuck. There used to be too many Marlows."
"Like, when we had dinosaurs and shit?," asks the boy.
Marlow gives him a glare. "And this is Afu. You'll have to forgive him, he's a teenager. He doesn't get to see females of the species in the store too often."
"Hey!," Afu exclaims indignantly.
...And then switches his focus to you, leaning casually on the counter. "...Hey."
"Wh..." You take a second to breathe. It does feel a bit like you just walked in on a sitcom routine. "What the hell is this place?"
Marlow takes a deep, slow breath, as though building to something dramatic. "The Back Room is the foremost purveyor in... lost... toys, and... uh..."
He quickly putters out.
He shakes his head, and gives a small shrug. "Eh, I can't remember the whole thing."
"We haven't said the whole thing in like..." Afu gives a bigger shrug. "Months? Bruh."
Marlow gives a small nod, and waves the whole thing off. "We buy and sell oddities and rejects. Recalled toys, unlicensed games, cancelled prototypes..."
Afu joins in. "Laser pointers. Those chocolate eggs with the toys in 'em."
"We've got unreleased episodes from a bunch of shows," Marlow adds. "And the theatrical cuts of movies you're not supposed to see the theatrical cut of. We've gooot... uh..."
You decide to save him from having to think of more things. "So you guys sell shit that's technically illegal, but nobody cares about enforcing."
"Is that not enough for you?," asks Marlow with a sly grin. "Are you not impressed?"
"She wants the heavy stuff," suggests Afu with an eyebrow waggle.
"You don't lead with the heavy stuff," replies Marlow, "that's why we keep scaring off customers. Lead with the medium stuff." He turns back to you. "We've got tabletop roleplaying books from back when they were actually Satanic. You into haunted dolls? We got a closet full of haunted dolls."
"We think they mostly keep each other in check," adds Afu.
"Ever see a bucket of crabs?," asks Marlow. "Same principle. We've got board games with body counts, dream rings, that soda that causes heart attacks..."
"Why did you say dream ring like that?," you feel obligated to ask.
"Like what?"
Afu chimes in. "You said it like it had a mission from God. Like... DREAM RING."
"d r e a m r i n g," you attempt to imitate.
"I just... said dream ring?," Marlow affirms, shaking his head. "Anyway, that's the sort of thing we deal in."
Ms. Halford holds out her hand, and you give her your empty cup as you rise from your seat.
"I... guess..." You stare off at nothing for a moment, trying to get it all sorted. "...If you see Kate, tell her I'm having a sleepover at the spooky house."
"You're camping out at the spooky house?"
"I own the spooky house," you huff on your way to the door. You stop. You sigh. "I live in the spooky house."
"Ohhh." Ms. Halford smiles wide, knowingly. "It's all coming together now." She grins just a little wider, and nods. "I'll let her know."
You begin the very long trudge back to the bus stop.
Past one field
and a bait shop
which you see some actual movement through the windows of, prompting you to walk faster
and past another field.
The bus arrives rather quickly; you don't think they went far.
"She wasn't home," you inform the bus. "Can you take me to The Back Room?"
"Sure," the bus replies.
You once again survey the damage of the less populated part of the town as you pass through it. You had to have ridden past here this morning, right? When the bus dropped Kate off...?
But then, you were still half asleep at the time
and Kate was here
and you probably just... didn't notice how it looked outside.
"Has anyone asked about me?," you suddenly ask the bus.
"No," says the bus.
"Can you let me know if anyone does?"
"Sure," the bus replies, "I'll make a note to log it if anyone inquires about you."
"Thanks," you say with a small nod. "I don't know how deep and big conspiracy this whole thing's gonna go, but... I want to try and stay on top of it. Oh! And if you see Kate, tell her I'm doing a thing tonight and she's invited? Please?"
"Will do," says the bus.
Near the edge of where the decay starts, the bus reaches a small shopping strip. Wedged between an "Old Fashioned" Burger Joint and a Massage Place
is The Back Room.
The bus pulls up to a stop on the far end of the parking lot.
You thank the bus, and head inside.
Absolute silence.
Two people behind the counter--one pretty old, the other a (vaguely familiar?) teenager, stare you down like you just caught them committing a crime.
"Bro," whispers the large teen, "there's a girl in here."
"Are... you looking for the massage place?" The older man points in their general direction.
You shake your head. "This is The Back Room, right?"
"Oh, shit," whispers the large teen, "she's here on purpose."
"Well," the old man whispers back, "she passes the shoe test."
"What's the shoe test?," you ask, finally breaking the illusion that you can't hear them whispering.
Their respective eyes widen. The two straighten their postures a bit.
The older man speaks first. "You can usually tell a cop by their shoes."
"You don't have cop shoes," the rotund boy adds a bit more quietly.
"This is the second time today someone thought I might be a cop," you mutter, shaking your head in mild disbelief. "People have pets bigger than me, how do I look like a cop?"
"Well," begins the old man, "you walk like you're about to arrest somebody. Or burn the building down. Welcome to The Back Room! I'm Marlow, though half the town calls me Tuck. There used to be too many Marlows."
"Like, when we had dinosaurs and shit?," asks the boy.
Marlow gives him a glare. "And this is Afu. You'll have to forgive him, he's a teenager. He doesn't get to see females of the species in the store too often."
"Hey!," Afu exclaims indignantly.
...And then switches his focus to you, leaning casually on the counter. "...Hey."
"Wh..." You take a second to breathe. It does feel a bit like you just walked in on a sitcom routine. "What the hell is this place?"
Marlow takes a deep, slow breath, as though building to something dramatic. "The Back Room is the foremost purveyor in... lost... toys, and... uh..."
He quickly putters out.
He shakes his head, and gives a small shrug. "Eh, I can't remember the whole thing."
"We haven't said the whole thing in like..." Afu gives a bigger shrug. "Months? Bruh."
Marlow gives a small nod, and waves the whole thing off. "We buy and sell oddities and rejects. Recalled toys, unlicensed games, cancelled prototypes..."
Afu joins in. "Laser pointers. Those chocolate eggs with the toys in 'em."
"We've got unreleased episodes from a bunch of shows," Marlow adds. "And the theatrical cuts of movies you're not supposed to see the theatrical cut of. We've gooot... uh..."
You decide to save him from having to think of more things. "So you guys sell shit that's technically illegal, but nobody cares about enforcing."
"Is that not enough for you?," asks Marlow with a sly grin. "Are you not impressed?"
"She wants the heavy stuff," suggests Afu with an eyebrow waggle.
"You don't lead with the heavy stuff," replies Marlow, "that's why we keep scaring off customers. Lead with the medium stuff." He turns back to you. "We've got tabletop roleplaying books from back when they were actually Satanic. You into haunted dolls? We got a closet full of haunted dolls."
"We think they mostly keep each other in check," adds Afu.
"Ever see a bucket of crabs?," asks Marlow. "Same principle. We've got board games with body counts, dream rings, that soda that causes heart attacks..."
"Why did you say dream ring like that?," you feel obligated to ask.
"Like what?"
Afu chimes in. "You said it like it had a mission from God. Like... DREAM RING."
"d r e a m r i n g," you attempt to imitate.
"I just... said dream ring?," Marlow affirms, shaking his head. "Anyway, that's the sort of thing we deal in."
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average rating: 5
They're also likely to have some good banned games from the eighties to go with that.
Also, try to slip in something nerd-cred-y in there. I don't know, make an obscure anime or video game reference.
Introduce ourself. I bet they are fanboys because of the video channel. Because of the cop shoes routine they are probably not very serious fanboys.
Lead with seeing Afu (the kid in the purple shirt) at the Biggest Shrug concert, and how awesome Kate is on guitar.
Casual discussion of tabletop games, followed by video games (which often have roots in tabletop games) on to the Dream Ring segue over to The Spooky House and maybe our video channel.
And maybe a Dullahan Waifu? ...I dunno, it could be a body pillow. Body pillows might follow us into the dungeon.
Seriously though, ask about Solomon's ring.
SierraC-era point-and-click game. The kind that results in you dying if you don't have it at the right point in the game."If we decide to try and purchase the ring and it's well outside our price range, see if we can get an, "Owner of the spooky house" one-time discount as a part of haggling. While we shouldn't be telling the whole town that bit of info, I imagine if anyone can either keep a secret or not be believed if they spill; it's these guys.
Definitely should drop the spooky house ownership thing after shopping around a bit though, since that's pretty heavy I think.
So! Look around a bit if we're curious about the more mundane stuff, but when we want to get to the point, mention that A) We bought the spooky house, B) it is in fact spooky, C) we want to know if they have any tips or merch that might keep us alive, or D) keep Mondol off our back.
Ask about the dream rings, which might be even more powerful than obscure video games. Try to get as many dream rings as possible, because each person has 10 fingers (10 dream rings per person) and 2 hands (2 rings per person if you put 1 ring on each ring finger) and right now we might have 2 or 3 people at the sleepover. So 6-60 possible rings to wear. They might give her that many if she says it is a spooky house experiment.
I'm disappointed that the tabletop games are Satanic, because that sounds a lot more of a bad idea to buy than if they were pagan.
(edited for spelling)
I support the Satanists who are fighting to get 10 commandment stuff off of public property (courthouses). And of course D&D is not actually Satanic because its magic lore does not follow Christian ideas.
But I can imagine Satanic rituals asking for magic power (in Plaire's world where magic is real) might attract dangerous spirits willing to make deals by pretending to be Satan.
It would be funny, though, if the "Satanic" tabletop games actually contact the Tradesmen. I think Plaire should actually eventually buy a D&D book just in case that is true. And hope it does not contact evil Tradesmen or something.
In addition to the solomon dream ring, we should also first see if they know anything about the spooky house before mentioning that we own it. Then ask if Afu and Marlow recognize the symbol on the dream map. Then ask if they have burner phones for sale.
Edit: Last I heard burner phones were not illegal in Plaire's universe, so OK we could ask
"There's also been a big push to ban what's referred to as 'burner phones,' citing their use by the criminal element."
A burner flip phone might actually be a good idea. What's the point of a smartphone in Plaire's case?
Investigate the tabletop game that is "Satanic" (and any other magic books that might have the Tradesmen symbol Plaire saw in her dreams). Ask if you could look at it and look through it for the Tradesmen symbol Plaire saw in her dreams (maybe it is called Satanic because ignorant people heard you make deals with spirits and assumed it was Satan, but it is actually the Tradesmen).
Of course Plaire does not know who the Tradesmen are, but this could just be her looking for that mysterious symbol she saw in her dreams in all of the magic books they sell there.
Edit: Plaire should do this even if she asks and the store owners tell her about what the Tradesmen symbol is, because she needs a way (a spell) to contact the Tradesmen to ask them about how to stop her spooky house killing people.
1. Once we've established our nerd cred, ask Afu and Marlow about the symbol on the dream world map.
2. Ask about procuring a pay-as-you-go burner phone.
And
Afu was at the concert
If they're wise to real dream rings we should see if we can also get a dullahan waifu, whatever form that takes. Figure, poster, body pillow? Or maybe it's inside the dungeon.
Man, that sure was weird how he said dream ring. It's almost like it was a cryptic message or something.